What defines me?

Cancer , A Dozen Kids , Life, Struggle

Rounding into our fifth year together it’s clear to me this is our perfect. Us together, as a team, a family, this is the close as it will ever get to perfection. On Mother’s Day at that beautiful mansion Marc stopped to tell me that for the very first time in his life he realized …

Continue reading

Oh Gosh, Mother’s Day is usually one of those days when I’m screaming on the inside. Mostly it has been filled of hiccups and stress if I’m just being honest. A few were okay but none stand out as the one to remember until this year. This year I didn’t plan! Let’s be real I …

Continue reading

Often I sit and sulk in the things I want to change but can’t. One of those being the men I chose to make children with. Seeing a post by one of the kids about the pain and regression they have over their fathers is painful. I don’t understand how they can see and not …

Continue reading

So I’ve already told you that I have some mental health struggles. Honestly, I’ve really got good reigns on it lately and seem to truly improve daily in my opinion. Often I find myself asking Marc as well. Do you think my meds are working well? Am I normal? As if anyone really is. However …

Continue reading

Here we are half a year into my first born daughter’s college education. I wish I was here to scream of the joy it’s brought her. However I’m certain there has been far more tears than smiles. She hasn’t found her place or that best friend yet. There isn’t much love interest and she is …

Continue reading

Really not much of an excuse to dropping the ball in the moment like I did. She came to the house and tried so hard to patiently explain even though I was just flat out rude. You see she came with Eight hot cocoa bombs not seven and greedily with my selfish chocolate addicted I …

Continue reading

Today in the mail came the order form for my Malachi’s cap and gown. I literally screamed for joy so loud I am certain the neighbors must have heard it. My son is going to finish his high school education after all the hard work and obstacles it’s finally over. It was uncertain if this …

Continue reading

I honestly have wanted and well did write so many times since the last post. But only in my head while driving the back country roads to and from therapy. Or in the quite moments I am in the kitchen baking or laundry room folding. It seems it’s so easy to blog when my fingers …

Continue reading

I was so nervous anticipating the graduation I forgot to enjoy it when the day arrived. The flood gates of emotions poured in as family flooded my yard. Hailey’s father the only one not willing to stay and support her. He made a b line for the door just as fast as he arrived. Nothing …

Continue reading