What defines me?

Cancer , A Dozen Kids , Life, Struggle

mommyof8withcancer.blog Doctor

[amazon_link asins=’B0748NNDK8,B06XHXC5XJ,B00338QENI,B01IPXY01S,1401952232,0452295726,B00UGDXUXK,1439170916,B007ZDRJ5O’ template=’ProductCarousel’ store=’buchtelassoci-20′ marketplace=’US’ link_id=’66fb77d6-bb64-11e8-a6ee-9b6023ecacd6′]This week I went back to the doctor. Twice in fact as I needed a referral from one to get back into the other. It’s no secret I am no fan of a doctor at all. Going when it’s absolute need and never in between. Entire pregnancies with only one …

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Yesterday I knew something was wrong as soon as I woke up. I felt sick and cramping pains through my stomach. By afternoon I had realized I was about to get my period again. 🙁 I went through most of my life without one at all. I had baby after baby. I breastfeed. I was …

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So I failed to fake anything yesterday. It was impossible to hide how terrible I felt. Marc that amazing man of mine he knows all though. I got up made him some breakfast and Malachi and myself just a bit of something. After finishing I ended up asking to just lay down a bit. I …

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I try desperately to avoid my illness. I love pretending it doesn’t exist. Putting it in the furthermost corner of my mind like it is in a time out. Every morning is the worst. I wake up feeling cramps and wanting to hurl. The worst thing about all the puking is my teeth and mouth …

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I just tried to lie to the one I love the most. I do it all the time. It’s natural and has been for some time. I lie to everyone who ask how are you feeling… I respond with I’m fine all the time. Even right now the laptop on my lap myself sitting on …

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 //pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({ google_ad_client: “ca-pub-1747195353515083”, enable_page_level_ads: true }); I woke up around 6 from the cramps in my stomach. They were something fierce. I had dinner last night and Marc’s parent’s bought my food. I sat to put the first bite to my mouth of the mouthwatering food and felt queasy instantly. …

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It’s been several days sitting here at this low. It’s consuming me now. I need to talk I need to pour my heart out in hopes that I’m still lovable after. I have struggled this week at everything life has felt nothing short of overwhelming. The flood, the move, all of the changes has been …

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If you read yesterday’s post you would know my pain level was high most of the day. I only held down a biscuit and a half of a protein shake. I don’t think I even consumed an entire pop to be honest. I didn’t intake much at all. Last night I tried my best not …

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I went to my apt. today so many results it was so intimidating. Tumour 7x9cm on cervix & down into vagina, not in bowel but “against” bladder (no probs with either motion lol). Spread to pelviv nodes & x1 para-aortic node. There’s a wee 3mm “node” on a lung so I’m to have a CT …

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