What defines me?

Cancer , A Dozen Kids , Life, Struggle

Rounding into our fifth year together it’s clear to me this is our perfect. Us together, as a team, a family, this is the close as it will ever get to perfection. On Mother’s Day at that beautiful mansion Marc stopped to tell me that for the very first time in his life he realized he doesn’t care how the world sees him. He didn’t look around to see if anyone was looking while we posed for a million pictures together. In fact he pursued the poses most finding locations all over the mansion.

Myself I realized quite some time ago his presence gave me the security to not even see the outside world. I mean honestly sitting at dinner there could be a million people I know around at tables and still I can only see him. It’s been so easy to let go of any friendship proving to be too much. Or even the friendships that just drained me. As he fulfills that need entirely for me.

Life pilling down around us at 8:30 pm each night I promise it all just melts away. As that is when we spend our time cuddling chatting about some silly tv series we are watching. Forgetting literally every hurdle the day threw at us. In those moments more and more I am seeing that it’s our perfect. The world can fall in around us and yet we would stand tall shielding each other.

The future is changing so quickly. Quicker than I can even keep up. It’s scary and uncertain with so many obstacles. Emotionally I feel so drained with all life is handing but yet one pet to my face. His text that he loves me or him playing pool getting his butt kicked yet again sending me a good game beautiful. I just know it doesn’t matter. I’m not alone ever in any of it and the power from our perfect it really does over come all.

Dare I say but everything in life that lead up to this perfect simply washed away. I look just to the future. To every series in my notes we will enjoy together. To every tradition the kids will creatively come up with. Looking forward to the small moments like chatting on the toilet in the bathroom together. Bedtime snacks we shouldn’t be eating but love so much. Seeing the children become successful adults. Life is our perfect.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.