What defines me?

Cancer , A Dozen Kids , Life, Struggle



My youngest son he has super struggles. He has pretty much no control of his emotions nor does he have an understanding of them. He can be hurt and sad but laughing uncontrollable. He has a very high pain tolerance. Not knowing when he has a ear infection or a cut until it’s pointed out by someone else. I had a really unhappy and unhealthy relationship for his entire life. He never really bonded with anyone but me and his siblings. He never trusted anyone but us. He had a few men try desperately to play the father role but to no avail. Paytyn tried public school and quickly it wasn’t the fit for him. I have home schooled since giving him even less outside interaction. Until meeting Marc and his family he hadn’t ever interacted well with others. He never much showed love for anyone outside of our house. Hugs were tough for his siblings to obtain in fact and just a special treat that seemed to be saved for Mom. Now I see him forming bonds and filling buckets like crazy with Marc and his entire family. I think he feels accepted with them. I feel far less alone in raising him. I don’t feel like all eyes are on me and I am this terrible mom when I go out and he has a melt down because I am not alone. I can see his progress as my confidence grows in taking him out and to Marc’s house to hang out. Marc’s house really teaches him to work on his struggles as well. He isn’t able to be as loud he needs to reign it in if he doesn’t want to scare the birds. He has to watch the jumping more as he has a fish tank in the living room. He has really gained a love for animals since meeting Marc. When Marc gave me my rat I hadn’t really processed what positive reaction Paytyn would have. With a no pet policy( a fee if we wanted to add to lease) a rat was something that wouldn’t require a fee or space. It worked out absolutely perfectly! The rat is spoiled rotten and Paytyn has learned to be gentle and kind. I feel we have grown leaps in the last 8 months. I have been exploring a curriculum for next year that would make me far more hands on and see what we can achieve together. Autism is a big hard world for my son. I am eager to help him tackle his dreams. I am more confident knowing I have support. I have seen so much growth in us both this past year our journey will be so bright.

31 thoughts on “Progress With My Boy

  1. Speaking Bipolar says:

    One of my closest friends has two Autistic children, so I’ve seen the unique challenges up close. I applaud you for working hard to continue to improve your and your son’s lives.

  2. Gikonyo Leah says:

    Hope you won’t mind passing my greetings to that handsome little pal.🤗

  3. jmanandmillerbug says:

    It sounds like you all found your way with each other and others! I hope that he continues to grow a little more each day!

  4. Alli Smith says:

    It’s so important to have support and I’m so glad you’ve found it. It’s also great that he’s forming bonds outside his immediate family.

  5. Valerie says:

    I have a 9 year old w very similar issues. My heart goes out to you. We are on new medication and it isn’t working. Homeschooled the 2nd half of last year. It’s a challenge.

  6. Tasheena Nicole Johnson says:

    I’m to happy to hear that you’ve found the support that was needed. I’m so happy for Paytyn, it really sounds that he’s found true happiness with the rat.

  7. Candy says:

    Wonderful to hear you have both grown and progressed over the last year. Continue on your wonderful journey together

  8. Loved your post! Your kids can be so happy to have such a patient mom. 🙂 I hope your love and affection for each other never stops growing.

    Best,
    Claudia
    https://thatsmeonline.net

  9. That’s amazing! It’s great that he has such supportive family and hope that he’ll continue to grow in his own pace as well.

  10. It’s great that he is growing so well and that you are learning along during the progress. It’s cute to know that he loves animals – a love so universal!

  11. I’m so happy you have support and seem to have a plan for next year! Keep being strong for him, you’re doing a great job!

  12. wendybigalbal says:

    Animals are so therapeutic for so many people! I’m happy you guys are figuring it all out.

  13. simplysensationalfood says:

    You sound like you have a great understanding of your sons needs and are doing everything that you can to nurture him and for him to gain confidence. It’s goiod to know that he is improving .

  14. Amber says:

    I’m so glad you’ve found ways to help your son. I understand. My son has autism, so I was always looking for ways to help him and make life easier.

  15. Lisa says:

    I’m so glad you have support, and are seeing growth and progress. Keep updating us!

  16. kalliamanika says:

    It seems to me you and your son are in a good path in your life! I am very glad you have found a way to help your child and by him creating new bonds that means he is growing and moving forward.

  17. I’m so glad you’ve seen such good progress. Having a pet can be so great for us all.

  18. Sarah Bailey says:

    Oh bless you both what a personal post to have shared. I am glad you have help and feel you are both progressing together.

  19. yumgoggle1 says:

    Progress is a great thing. It’s good you have support and having pets can really make a difference.

  20. It’s so great that Marc and his family have had such a positive effect on Paytyn. It sounds like they are accepting and loving and Paytyn can see that.

  21. Vasundhra says:

    I am so happy that your son is making progress. Pets can have a huge effect on our lives and it is great that he has learned to be more gentle.

  22. Kristina says:

    It’s so good to read about the progress your son has made. It’s great that you’ve found a way you can help him, creating bonds and relationships is so important!

    Love,
    K xx

  23. I always have believed that when we have something of our own to love, that our brain feels safe and then will explore new avenues for healing. If it doesn’t feel safe, then safety is what is focuses on. By safe, meaning dealing with new environments, people, schedules, etc.

  24. Mary says:

    So reminds me of my little brother who has asd. It’s not easy, but it is rewarding.

  25. I think the best of it is, he has all of you guys to understand his situation and to care for his needs. You are one strong Mom.

  26. ade young says:

    Pets can be really therapeutic, I hope you continue your progress. I admire how strong a mom you are.

  27. Phoebe says:

    I am happy that you are embracing his autism so that you can help him better. I work for kids with different disabilities and delays and it’s really heartbreaking when parents are in denial because it also hinders them from doing what should be done.

  28. Kermilia says:

    How sweet! I’m so glad that you’ve found something that works for him! So encouraged by his progress and I can’t wait to continue to follow his journey!

  29. Autumn says:

    Thanks for sharing such a personal story of your son my son used to be similar in this way.

  30. It’s great that you were able to find a companion to suite his needs. I hope things keep getting better for your family.

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