What defines me?

Cancer , A Dozen Kids , Life, Struggle

So I am really glad that I got some more info today from my nurse… There is a huge difference in chemo and chemo radio lol. I need both!!! But These first 4 cycles are just chemo I check in at the center I take a seat they put in a canula which from my understanding is just like an iv. I am hoping that goes smooth since I have never been able to get them to take… my veins roll and are weak and kink. So I couldn’t donate and they poke me like 9 times before they get one and typically I then have to hold the line and not move whatsoever. I will be there a few hours while they pump me full of cytotoxicins. It seems to be similar to dialysis and I often went with Chuck’s grandfather to that so I sorta know what to expect. Chances are I will lose my hair…. maybe even my eyebrows….. but who knows I could get lucky and it just thin out… I have tons of it. I debated chopping it now and making a wig… lol.  If my canula isn’t succussful btw I get a vad which im super afraid of that is put in a vein in my chest….. I skipped epidurhl so many times from my fear of needles…. All for nothing…… I am telling you that is a serious disappointment. They said I may or may not be able to drive myself and mostly ill feel tired weak and drained……. I have some nausea meds as well…….. I get a rest period between cycles at least……. Well let’s see how tough i really am


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